When is a parenting blog not a parenting blog?

Getting started

When I first thought about starting a blog, I had just returned to work after my second maternity leave and so was still in the throes of intense ‘motherhood’: still in the world of sleeplessness and nappies, feeling guilty about not feeling guilty about returning to work. I was still very much obsessed with babies and children and my role as a mother, so I named the blog ‘themotherhub‘, mainly just because I thought it sounded pretty snappy.

There was two years between setting up my WordPress account and writing my first post. Let nobody say that I have a tendency to procrastinate and overthink in the extreme; not me, a real ‘fly by the seat of my pants’ kind of gal.

Mummy-fied

Two years have passed and I am no longer in the fog of early motherhood. My eldest is at school and my youngest happily ensconced in Montessori. I can think of things beyond my children, I want to think of things beyond my children. Do I want to pin my blogging identity to parenting ? Do I want to identify as a parenting blogger? I think of my blog as something that is mine, something that gives me an identity beyond wife, mother, employee. When I look back at my posts over the last few months not many of them are actually about parenting: When is a parenting blog not a parenting blog?

Before I started blogging,  I wanted to find a website that spoke to me as a mother and as a woman – I didn’t want to be mummy.  I am someone who loves her kids and loves talking about them, yes, but also loves talking about books, about films and current affairs, about TV and make-up. About being a woman, and all of the parts that make up being a woman; because I am a human who lives in the world, I knew that there must be a lot of other women out there, exactly the same as me, who didn’t want to be ‘mummy-fied’ either. 

I had fallen for the spin that mummies aren’t cool or interesting.

upsidedown-ophelia
Because in many ways motherhood was the impetus to get me started. It has made me realise the importance of holding on to my own identity and identifying what is important to me and what I like to do for myself. Becoming a mother certainly wakened my dormant feminist sensibilities, which now inform so many of my posts. They were heightened further when my daughter was born and the inevitable comparisons came between her and my son, so gender has become something I also love to write and read about; and it’s certainly not something I gave much thought to, pre-motherhood.

The sum of our parts

boxes

I confess when I started blogging I didn’t want to be seen as ‘just‘ a mother. But none of us are ‘just’ anything. We are all the sum of our parts. Mother, wife, friend, reader, beauty lover, feminist, over-thinker,  TV watcher, colleague, introvert, sister, daughter. All of these things inform who I am and what I write about, you can’t separate one from the other. Without any of them the whole of me, the woman I am, is altered. We all know this about ourselves, and yet as a society we like to put people in boxes, to label them. It makes us feel secure. As parenting bloggers we are a rich and diverse community with content as varied as our personalities. So whilst I might still resist mummy-fication, I am happy to be themotherhub, parenting blogger.

 

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84 comments

  1. I’m really glad I read your post. As a father, and relatively new dad blogger, I have thought about what content may not resonate with the appropriate audience, but I figure, as long as being a father is at the core of my motivations, and my writings, there’s room to explore other interests and ponderings. I hope! Thanks.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Great I glad you enjoyed it !

      Like

  2. I have started a parenting blog very recently, based on my experiences from the first year and hoping to help others. However, what you have said really rings true with me – why should I have a blog just about being a parent? What is wrong with being an individual outside of ‘mama’? For the last year my identity has been ‘B’s mum’, but maybe a blog is the way to become myself again. Thank you for this post! May I link it in one of my future posts?

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Thanks for reading – of course, please do feel free to link it

      Like

  3. […] a very interesting blog post entitled ‘when is a parenting blog not a parenting blog’ (https://themotherhub.ie/2016/09/11/when-is-a-parenting-blog-not-a-parenting-blog/) and it got me thinking about identity and individuality when you become a […]

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Loved your post! It’s true we are more than just mommy. We are interesting women! Thank you for sharing!

    Liked by 2 people

  5. Very True! Thank you for putting in the time to write this post. I never viewed mothers in that sense and this really opened my eyes. I just started my blog and it is interesting to have so many men and women with different perspectives that are also blogging. It really changes the way you look at things

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I love your post! I have recently become a mom and have been thinking along those same lines. I love being E’s mom but I’m so much more than that. I’ve recently started blogging again, since my time restrictions keep me away from my YouTube channel, but I want my blog to be much more than just a parenting blog. It will be a huge part of it, sure, because that’s my new reality, but I don’t want to limit myself to just that. Thank you for writing this post. It summed up exactly how I feel.

    Liked by 2 people

  7. Yeah, your post is real. Sometimes we get lost, don’t we?

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Great posts, I’m trying to decide if I should start a separate blog for books, I have a passion for reading that others who aren’t parents may share and I don’t want to turn anyone off.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. emmahartridge · · Reply

    Just started a blog. Called Yet Another Parent Blog. Wonder if you are right- have I pigeon-holed myself. Yes I am a parent but many other things. Maybe I should change it to Yet Another Parent Blog but with other bits not about parenting too. Catchy??

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Someone said to me that you don’t need to worry about sticking to one thing. That some people will come to your blog for the parenting posts and others for posts about books or tv or whatever. You don’t have to write for just one kind of reader . Write for you !

      Like

  10. Great post. A lot of what I write is focused on parenting and the interactions I have with my daughter, but I also am trying to find the right way to have my blog be so much more than that. Good things to keep in mind… We are so many different, wonderful, amazing things!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Beautifully said! As a mother of 4 who loves to blog about all things, I agree

    Like

  12. “You can’t separate one from other” a beautiful line!!! Certainly..there are so many aspects of life that are related to us as woman ,Mother,daughter, reader ….and many more.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. This was such a wonderful read! I am a new Mommy and blogger and adjusting to both. So this right here was a read that made me feel and understand both a little more. Thank you!

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Nice post. I’m new to this parenting blogging world but I just like thinking about the topic and writing what I think. Thanks for your blog.

    Like

  15. I really appreciate this. In the early years of parenting, I felt defined by motherhood. Now, I feel like I want to break out of that a bit. I just started a blog and knew that I’d want to cover parenting in some ways, but explicitly did not want to be defined as a “mommy blogger” and have been thinking about how to walk that line. Thanks for your thoughtful post!

    Liked by 1 person

  16. very good article..mother dont have time for lazy..keep fight

    Like

  17. As a mother who has just started a blog and in the middle of writing a post regarding identity since I’ve became a mother, this is refreshing to get another point of view on it! Thankyou for sharing 🙂

    Like

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